LTM: 8 Jan

I wrote this as wanting to self harm or use. I have so much I can use…. Both of which aren’t options. Had an appointment today with someone who didn’t have time. I wanted to ask for a referral to a nutritionist but I couldn’t as couldn’t explain myself when I just didn’t and don’t deserve it.

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LTM: Living in this world

Dear Eliza,

You wanted to write this, to see if it’ll help. Except that sitting here, pen in hand, you wonder how writing to yourself can help. Especially when you’re writing in 3rd person. So don’t. Hi Eliza. This is yourself speaking. Weird. Scrap that. I don’t know what I want to hear, so don’t know what to write. I don’t know what will help. I don’t know how to calm myself down.

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Letter to myself: 18th August ’17


It’s okay. It’s okay. Just breathe. You are okay. You will be okay. I promise you. It will get easier. I know it can’t seem possible. You are worth it. Eliza, I promise you it’s okay. It’s okay if you’re scared. It’s okay if you’re freaking. It’s okay if you use. It’s okay if you hate yourself. I don’t like how much you hate yourself, but, it’s okay. Whatever is, or isn’t, I promise you it’s okay. I love you. Continue reading “Letter to myself: 18th August ’17”

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