I hate that I’m thinking this way but it helps me to put down my thoughts. And however much my blog is about reasons to live, the tagline is journey from suicidality. Well, this is part of my journey. Continue reading “I want to be suicidal”
It’s cloudy and rainy here today. The other day the weather was exactly the same. Continue reading “One Hundred and Ten: The sun is present.”
I can’t believe that I’ve never written this reason post before. I mean, c’mon, shoes, how could I not have put this one down yet??? Continue reading “One Hundred and Nine: Shoes”
WATWB is about looking in the news the last Friday of each month and finding something positive there, both so that you have to look in the news for positivity and to spread happiness. My search was for: One good deed. I came across a few inspiring stories but the one I liked best was about a community who started a new library together when theirs burnt down. Continue reading “WATWB: One good deed”
I came across an article describing The gift of BPD. I found it helpful, informative and loved reading it. I asked if I could copy it here but was told to post the link instead. Happy reading
Someone just told me they loved my avatar on SF and, I really (really, really, really 10 to the power of a billion) need the reminder at the moment… Continue reading “One Hundred and Eight: Be where you are”
I bought some new pencil crayons that I’m really enjoying.
I’m in tears here. And, it’s okay. I’m allowed to cry.
I’m rewriting all the letters I wrote to myself out in a separate journal. I have them all over, dotted through my journals (and considering that I use on average a new journal every 2 months, sometimes less, sometimes more), and in various places online. I want them all together. Continue reading “He left.”
One hundred and six.
The ability to cry. Continue reading “One Hundred and Six: The ability to cry”
I was wanting to use some stuff I had in my room to burn and was trying to calm myself down and be rational. Telling myself it was okay to want to didn’t work, so dialogued it through. Surprisingly enough (well, it was surprising to me) it helped.
Okay E, so you want to use them.
I. want. to. use. them.
Okay, so you want to
It’s not okay Continue reading “Dialogue through wanting to SH – TW”
I’m exhausted, tired and resentful. Really, just feeling so damn alone. As though there is no one in the world. No one who cares. No one who would be here. No one who is here. I guess this is the perfect time to write this post. It hurts to be alone. It hurts to know that there really isn’t anyone for me to reach out to. It hurts that Continue reading “One Hundred and Five: People who join me on the journey”
Someone emailed me this quote. I replied to her. Although I don’t believe in the quote fully. What would you attempt if you knew you wouldn’t fail? How about you NEVER can fail? That life is never about failing, rather about learning, about getting up, and about attempting :) Continue reading “One Hundred and Four: I would attempt”
I get to define my life. I get to choose what everything means. Everything that happens. Everything I do or don’t do. I get to choose what it means for me. I define it. No one and nothing else does. Continue reading “One Hundred and Three: The meaning I attribute”